Ah March and spring is very definitely in the air! Not because
your water tank has finally defrosted after the worst Winter in a
zillion years, nor because the odd daffodil's dared to pop it's
head above the parapet, but because the thoughts of home owners all
over the land are thinking about home improvements building and odd
jobs.
How do I know this? Because March is the month the Ideal Home
Show (sponsored by Anglian Home Improvements at Earls Court London
from 17th-27th tickets from... oh go on the interweb and let me get
back to the point) and the organisers spend vast amounts of money
finding out the ideal time to hold these kind things.
Whether you book up for a full 10-day pass to the event or just
sketch out ideas for a new patio area on the back of a napkin, you
will be hurled into not only the maelstrom of the biggest
controversy humankind can have in this season (actual home
improvements themselves) but also the second biggest
controversy facing humankind, namely what's generally called
'Global Warming'.
Unfortunately for anyone who likes things simple, global warming
is not so much an umbrella term as a mega marquee at an outdoor
wedding during the monsoon season. But in a nutshell - admittedly a
rather big one - its all about: Is the earth's climate heating up,
if so is this caused by human action, will this global warming mean
'disaster' for eco-systems and their flora and fauna (including
people) and what action humankind can make to stop & reverse
this 'global warming', if any, and if so will it make any
difference?
Phew, anyone would think this global warming thingy was a matter
of life and death! Oh, apparently it is.... To put it another way,
if in the 80s Morrissey could write a song called 'Meat is Murder',
then it won't be long until some 21st Century equivalent launches a
track called 'Conventional Light Bulbs Are Genocide.'
All of which means you can't as much paint your downstairs loo
or hang some pictures without running a green rule of thumb over
any projects you agree with your nearest & dearest. So to help,
here's a little guide to what's what and, even if everything that
follows will be challenged by someone, I think I have an answer to
your dilemma.
Mainstream scientific opinion reckons the earth is warming up at
an alarming rate and we'd better start going green NOW if we don't
want to be up a river without a paddle (quite literally in an
increasingly alarming number of parts of the world).
Although most of us are pretty clueless about the science of all
this, peer pressure means most of us have jumped on board the green
bandwagon and spend most of every weekend filling different
coloured bins, bags and boxes for 'recycling' to save the planet's
scarce resources, not mention our embarrassment if we let the side
down and put these bins, bags & boxes out on the wrong
collection days.
But wait! There is another point of view and one that at face
value seems pretty hard to ignore, especially if you're choosing a
new hot water and heating system and are faced with either a
'conventional' boiler for a few hundred quid on one hand, or a very
green geo-thermal heating system for several thousand pounds on the
other.
Let's call this alternative view the 'Jeremy Clarkson' or 'JC'
position, for the simple reason that hardly anyone has heard of the
'anti consensus' champion Lord Monkton. However, we would like to
mention we're sure JC fills his differently coloured bins, bags
& boxes and puts them out on the correct collection days in a
way Bill Oddie would heartily approve of. Probably....
The JC view says there is a conspiracy by the green lobby. They
argue 31,000 scientists have signed a letter arguing against almost
every global warming argument. They say ground temperature may be
going up but such temperature change is normal. After all, the
planet was in an ice age 12,000 years ago, and this ended without
help from mankind and industrialisation.
What's more, JCers argue that temperatures are stable at crucial
heights in the atmosphere, so there's nothing much to worry about.
In any case, the worst polluters are developing nations (e.g. China
and India) and as the West has shown, the best way to reduce
population growth and clean up industry is to become advanced
economies such as the US or Germany.
Confused? Good - I'm not the only one. But a couple of 'facts'
may help you with your home improvements. First, many 'green'
products can pay for themselves pretty quickly. Secondly, many such
improvements are eligible for Government (both central and local)
grants. Go to
www.energysavingtrust.org.uk
to find out if you are eligible.
Thirdly, and alternatively, common sense suggests the JC view
has merit. We recycle bottles but there's no shortage of resources
here as glass is made out of sand! And if global temperature is
rising, why have we just had the worst two winters in a
generation?
Lastly, and most convincingly, perhaps the best help for our
actual decision making can be found in a variation of 'Sod's Law'.
Its simple form states that 'whatever can go wrong, will go wrong'.
However, the variation useful here is: however well intentioned
your action, not only will the opposite of your intention occur, it
will worsten the situation you were trying to help in the first
place.
The best example of this variation, which to give its proper
philosophical name is counter finality, is demonstrated by
the cane toad. This delightful little beast was introduced to
Australia from its native South America in the last century as a
method of pest control. It got rid of the pests all right. In fact
it thrived so well it destroyed many other indigenous species as
well! The cane toad is now considered a pest itself, and one far
more serious than the one it was meant to solve. See? Sod's Law
(counter-finality variation) occurs.
So our two pence worth for you is take what advice you can and
then choose the home improvement or building work that fulfils your
needs & wants most completely, whether this be cost
effectiveness, adding value or, heaven forbid, to just make your
home a nicer place to be. Who knows, with such a cunning
philosophical double-bluff, you might thwart Sod's Law (counter
finality variation), if not global warming, after all.
DU.IT Handyman & Building Services.